Change the game. Don’t let the game change you.


Confrontation is not for me. This is probably why I spent much of my life struggling to stand up for myself and what I believed in. However, after recent let downs, ghostings by boys, witnessing too many moral injustices and constant disappointments from some of those people closest to me, I’ve taught myself to call others out and speak up when I see unfairness.

Many of these desires to speak my mind have come from relationships gone wrong. Where I wasn’t communicating or having what I was communicating being heard. No longer is a boy getting away with being distant. I will query why his patterns have changed and expect an honest and respectful response. No longer will a ‘friend’ attempt to place blame on me without hearing about how I feel and how I would like to be treated. No longer will I not say what I need to in a respectful and considerate fashion. No longer will I bite my tongue when I see injustice towards others or myself. I need to be this person because others cannot. I need to be this person because deep down that’s who I am. I need to be this person to inspire others to also take a stand.

I understand how difficult it can be to speak up. Of late, I’ve challenged myself to be more forward and use the support systems I already have in place to voice my concerns. It’s about drawing on the strategies and networks you already have to assist you in becoming more assertive. It’s about learning to inform others of how you expect to be treated by what you say, do and accept. It’s about living with integrity and intention. It’s about believing in what you are saying.

Today, on International Women’s Day, I hope you can promise yourself that when you see a need, you speak it. Be assertive and live a life of intention and truth. Speak the voice that shakes within.


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